When Jack Sparrow Came Down The Chimney
by xoBeautifulXDisasterxo
Summary: Just some holiday randomness! When Jack, Barbossa, and Gibbs suddenly appear in Christina's house on Christmas morning, all hell breaks loose! And what happens when Davy Jones and Edward Cullen show up? PARODY! One-shot. Merry Christmas!


Alright, I'm really bored if I keep writing these one-shot drabbles! I hope you guys enjoy it though and I hope you guys have the best Christmas ever!

_Love you all!_

_~Disaster~_

* * *

Christina awoke with a start as the credits began to roll as the Christmas special ended. 12:03 flashed on the cable box clock which meant it was officially Christmas morning. She stretched. There was absolutely no movement in her house or a sound. Everyone must have headed to bed, leaving her to drown in a puddle of drool on the recliner.

Suddenly, there was a thump overhead. It almost sounded to Christina like boots on the rooftop. But, that was ridiculous. Santa wasn't real.

Cling. Cling Cling.

Now that sound came from the fireplace. She was sure of that. Tip-toeing softly, Christina made her way across the living room. She knelt against the icy tile next to the fireplace, tilted her head, and looked up the chimney. All she could see was darkness.

"Stop being freaked out, Christina," she mumbled to herself as she stood back up. "It's nothing."

As Christina walked out of the living room and towards the stairs, she heard it again.

Cling. Cling. Cling. THUD.

Christina spun around quickly to see what had made that terrible sound. A dark shadow crawled out of the fireplace.

"Santa?" Christina whimpered, unsure of what to.

"Now that was…interesting," Santa slurred in a voice that sounded nothing like the holly jolly guy everyone made him out to be. Christina flipped on the light to see none other than Captain Jack Sparrow standing in her living room.

"OH. MY GOD." Christina stuttered. "You're…you're…"

"Well, go on. Spit it out, we haven't got all day," Jack urged her.

"…Captain Jack Sparrow!" Christina finished. "Holy crap! You just came down my chimney!"

"Which was extremely pointless," came a new voice from the kitchen. Into the living room walked Barbossa with his feathered hat. "He should have just used the back door."

Jack made an annoyed voice. "These things need to be done right, if they're needed to be done properly."

"No one understands what yer sayin'," Barbossa told him.

Jack crossed his arms. "Gibbs does. Mr. Gibbs!"

"Yes, captain," Mr. Gibbs rushed into the living room, holding a plate with a sandwich on it.

"Where did you get that?" Barbossa asked.

"From the kitchen," Gibbs told him.

"You went into my refrigerator and made yourself a sandwich?" Christina asked.

"Bad luck to leave food uneaten," Gibbs explained.

"Everything is bad luck to you," Jack replied. Gibbs just shrugged while Barbossa rolled his eyes.

"We need to explain why we're here," Barbossa said to Jack.

Jack clapped his hands together. "Right. We're here because there's been a mistake."

"Mistake?" Christina repeated.

"Aye, a mistake," Barbossa agreed.

"What kind of mistake?"

"You see, somehow the chest of Davy Jones got mixed in with your presents," Barbossa explained. "And we need to be getting it back before bad things begin to happen."

"Er…what kind of bad things?" Christina asked, even though she was afraid of the answer.

"Evil things," Barbossa said.

"Bad luck," Gibbs added.

"Oh, what's that?" Jack pranced over to the coffee table and picked up the TV remote. He started pressing all the buttons. A local news station appeared on the TV. Jack shrieked and ran behind Barbossa. Barbossa grabbed him by the arm and yanked him forward.

"There's a wench in your box," Jack said, pointing.

"That's a TV," Christina told him.

"I knew that," Jack huffed. "What's a TV?"

"Hey guys! What's up?" Edward Cullen suddenly walked into the room.

"What are ye doing here, boy?" Barbossa demanded to know.

"EDWARD CULLEN!" Christina screamed.

"Well, I saw that there was a gathering of fictional characters and I always did like parties," Edward addressed the group. He glanced over at Jack. "You look…delicious. You're making me hungry."

Jack shrieked again and hid behind Christina.

"Can I look delicious?" Christina asked, grinning from ear to ear.

"Get out!" Barbossa yelled at Edward, pointing to the door. "Ye don't belong in here!"

Edward sighed sadly and headed for the door. "If you see Harry and Ron can you tell them…"

"OUT!" shouted Barbossa.

Edward sighed and headed out the door.

"Bad luck…vampires…" Gibbs murmured with a shiver. "Wizards too."

"Oh shut it," Jack mumbled, still hiding behind Christina.

"Now back to the matter at hand. We be needing that chest," Barbossa told Christina.

"I'd love to help you guys out but everything's wrapped and under the tree," Christina beckoned towards the tree.

Jack, Gibbs, and Barbossa looked at the tree. They looked at each over. Suddenly, the three dove for the presents and began to unwrap madly.

"No," Barbossa mumbled as he tossed a sparkling blue ipod nano across the room.

"Oh, soft…" Jack smiled as he wrapped a Christmas tie around his neck.

"You guys can't do this!" Christina complained.

"We need the chest!" Barbossa argued. "Or bad things will happen."

"Like this!" Davy Jones now stood in the middle of room, looking eviler than ever.

For the third time, Jack shrieked. He grabbed the ipod and chucked it as hard as he could at Jones. It flew right over the fish captain's head as he laughed evilly.

"I want your soul!" he hissed as he pointed a tentacle in Jack's direction. "And my chest!"

"Is that the bad thing that was going to happen?" Christina asked.

"Don't worry! I know what to do!" Edward exclaimed as he burst through the back door. With vampire speed, Edward rushed around Davy Jones and Jones suddenly vanished, with Edward standing in his place. The vampire licked his lips.

"I was in the mood for seafood," he explained. "Well, thanks for the snack guys!"

Edward went back out the back door. Jack threw an onion at him as he did.

"I still don't like the guy," he mumbled. "He stole all our fan girls."

Barbossa and Gibbs nodded in agreement.

"The chest!" Gibbs exclaimed as he unwrapped one last present.

"That's what you guys were looking for?" Christina asked. She walked over and took the chest from Gibbs. "That's not the real Dead Man's Chest. It's a cookie jar inspired from the movie to look like the chest for my friend Chelsea."

"Oh," the three smiled, understanding.

"You unwrapped all my presents for nothing. Great." Christina mumbled.

"But we'll still be taking that chest," Barbossa grinned.

"But it's a cookie jar," Christina repeated.

"Still," Barbossa yanked the jar from her hands and headed for the back door.

"Can I keep this?" Jack asked Christina, pointing to the tie still wrapped around his neck.

Christina rolled her eyes. "Whatever."

"Oh. Good." Jack smiled as he followed the other two out the door.

"Just don't come back for New Year's!" Christina shouted after them.

_**ONE WEEK LATER:**_

At exactly midnight on New Year's morning, Gibbs, Jack, and Barbossa burst through the back door, all holding bottles of rum.

"Don't forget me!" Edward exclaimed, waving his arms.

"Bloody pirates," Christina mumbled.


End file.
